4/16/2021 0 Comments Codependent No More Book
They are just picking up the slack However, if you have been codependent for a while, its safe to assume that you cant help the dependent.
![]() Codependent No More Book Full Summary CodependentContents Bullet Summary Full Summary Codependent Are Also Addicted Codependents Need for Control Codependents Psychology You Must Detach Yourself How to Heal Real Life Applications CONS PROS Review Bullet Summary Codependency is an addiction Codependent people lack self esteem and they caretake out of a need for control and security Excessive codependent almost never helps dependent people and make everyone worse off Healing from codependence start with awareness and with taking care of oneself.Full Summary About The Autohr: Melody Beattie is a self-help author who has been focusing on abusive relationships and codependent relationships.She doesnt have a psychology-related background, but she has grown her expertise over decades of personal research and experience.Introduction: Everyones Unique The author says Codependent No More is not a cookbook for mental health because each person is unique. Codependent Definition This is how Melody Beatty defines a codependent partner: Someone who has let someone elses behavior affect them and who is obsessed with controlling that persons behavior The heart of not definition is not in the other person though. Its in the supportive partner who, as codependent, allow the loop to exist. ![]() Codependent Are Also Addicted Codependents arent as crazy and sick as alcoholics, but they hurt just as much. And they might be just as addicted as their troubled, substance addicted partners. The author is not sure whether codependency can be labeled a disease, but it can make you sick. Over-involvement indeed can lead to anxiety and if you forget about taking care of yourself, you can get dragged down into the dependents abyss. Also, its not helpful to help anybody: the codependent might actually contribute to the dependent partner staying sick. Codependents Dont Act, But React Codependent people dont really act, but they are always reacting on others behavior, troubles and misdeeds. The author says that learning how to non react, or to act less andor in smarter ways, is one of the keys to fixing codependency. Codependents Need for Control The author says that codependents become obsessed with helping and pandering to their dependent partner as a way of controlling their environment. They have often been hurt in the past, and caretaking becomes a way of achieving some type of stability and security in their lives. ![]() But they dont realize it because they dont have a good the emotional intelligence to understand their own feelings, thoughts and drives. Codependents Psychology Codependents tend to come from troubled families, but they deny it. They tend to have low self esteem and blame themselves for everything. They set their feelings aside, fail to listen to them and repress themselves (including anger). Codependent people tend to be pushed over like too nice guys, and they often resort to passive aggressiveness. Furthermore: Deny their problem Pretend it will get better Binge-spend, over-eat Have temper outburst (and are ashamed for their anger) Seek love from people incapable of loving them ( avoidants and emotionally unavailable partners ) Wonder if they will ever find love Have sex when they dont want to Can get sexually repulsed by their partner Fantasize of extramarital affairs Sacrifice themselves (for things that dont require sacrificing sometimes) You Must Detach Yourself I thought it was particularly deep when the author says: The codependent feels responsible so much because the people around them are responsible for so little.
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